Caring

I am a member of the “I Don’t Give a Fuck Anymore Club”,
A 12 step program for people who once cared.
Caring brought us stress, anxiety, anger, and disdain.
It destroyed us and those we cared about as well.

John cared about his job and was forced to train his own replacement.
Mary cared about her husband and got replaced by a young male.
Fred cared about the environment and now they frack in his backyard.
Sue cared about her cat who moved in next door.

Caring is toxic to the soul.
You suffer every hurt of someone else,
And every setback to a cause,
When you have your own private suffering to bear.

To care about an institution is the stupidest thing.
Institutions are designed to squander any opportunity for good.
They are full of people who claim to follow rules for the greater good,
But only as a ruse to suck the greater good dry for their own benefit.

Oh, yes, humans do follow one general rule,
“To thine own self be true”.
But it means “Screw others if you need to,
And pretend to care if you must”.

“The I Don’t Give a Fuck Anymore Club” is for people who were foolish enough to care.
They thought the cause was all about the cause, but it never was.
They thought the institution was all about its vaunted goal, but it wasn’t.
They thought others cared, but they really didn’t.

The “I don’t give a fuck anymore” state is liberating.
You can feel your arteries opening.
Your muscles relaxing.
And your heart closing.

You long to say, “No, I don’t care,
You have mistaken me for someone else.
Here’s a quarter, call someone who still cares.
I don’t give a fuck, not even a flying fuck, whatever that is”.

I could have been a great success had I cared less.
I could have lived longer.
I could have lived lighter.
I have aged beyond my years by adding worry about others to worries about myself.

Now I am facing an early grave.
Caring has caused my telomeres to fray.
The people, the causes, and the Institutions I cared about have moved on.
My care meant little and accomplished even less.

Now don’t mistake me and think I care what you think,
Or that I claim any merit by having been addicted to care.
Caring is the rare disease that has no Internet support group.
It’s a disease everyone wants to claim, but no one wants to have.

We in the “I Don’t Give a Fuck Anymore Club” don’t have sponsors.
To sponsor someone else would require caring.
We go it on our own.
There’s no one to call if we lapse back and give a damn.

I often wonder who started our group,
Since that would have required caring about us all.
All that is known is that the founder passed on worn down by care,
A failure in the eyes of the club who can’t remember his name.

We care addicts were raised by parents who bought the scam that people care,
When what they really care about is only themselves and their kin.
We all wonder now how our parents ever got old enough to mate,
When evolution should have taken care of them long before.

A meeting of the club is a cold affair.
There’s no hugging and no support.
We take our turns admitting errors.
But no one cares.

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~ by jpgee on November 28, 2012.

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